Limbo
by Kotay
Summary: It was too good to be true. It had to be expected. The fist date.


Hello everyone! This is an attempt to explore Oliver & Felicity's (disastrous) first date.  
(My mother tongue isn't english, so be patient...)  
Standard disclaimer applies. 

* * *

It was too good to be true. It had to be expected. But her natural optimism was quite well-fed in recent months: the city had never been so quiet! Quentin Lance, after a long convalescence, was promoted on the field to the rank of captain and the first thing he had done was dismantled the task force that was created to capture The Arrow. Now the former vigilante, after the epic rescue of the city, was now officially become the guardian angel of the city and most of the people had accepted him as a local hero, partially ignoring the constant discussions about the legality of his actions.

This had a visible effect on Oliver. It was as if a weight was finally lifted from his shoulders. And he seemed amazed at how to be accepted by City Starling counted so much to him.

A new courage, a new and unexpected hope for the future could be seen in his eyes lately. So much that, to the surprise of his team, he'd accepted the proposal of his consultants and lawyers to run for mayor of the city. Oliver wanted to honor the memory of his mother, and in the meantime wanted to be able to protect even more Starling City. Of course it was also a move designed to rebuild his public image in order to have a greater weight in trying to get back the QC.

Felicity was so proud of him! And even though they weren't able to solve the mystery of the disappearance of Thea, all this positivity was really something.

And the way in which Oliver had begun to deal with his own problems and his own insecurities, pushed herself to do the same.

The meeting with Slade had taught her that in desperate situations she was really able to do what she thought was impossible. Things she believed able to do only with her computer.

Slade had made her grow in many ways. One of these was that she had to deal with her feelings towards Oliver. Until that moment Felicity had masked all with the admiration she had for him and for the way he fought for the city. But in reality she could no longer make fun of herself: it wasn't just admiration, she was in love with him. Nothing like those moments in the Queen Mansion had put her in front of the reality of the situation.

Being told "I love you" was the last straw. For a few seconds she'd afforded the luxury of thinking of to be with him, as a real couple. This, as well as to make her dreaming, did frightened her to death too.

She'd never felt this way, a step away from pure joy yet on the brink of the abyss. She'd never loved anyone like him and she felt so fragile to deal with this sentiment that could completely crush her.

Felicity Smoak and Oliver Queen: the idea was absolutely disastrous. It could't be true. And probably that was why on the beach of Lian Yu, she had to said that aloud, needing to be told by him that it was absurd. But Oliver had not given her this satisfaction: he had not denied nor confirmed anything.

And in that limbo Felicity, after many days, found her answers. That day on the beach wasn't Oliver who she was in front of, but The Arrow. And for the hero was even more valid than ever the phrase that he had told her after their return to Russia. Oliver had barricaded himself behind this so stubborly because he was not ready for a serious relationship and maybe he did not think he would ever be.

Felicity had given him the opportunity to take a step back or a step forward. Oliver had retreated and Felicity knew she had no right to ask anything more. So she took a step back too and everything returned to normal.

The following months, however, Starling city had less and less needed of the Arrow and more and more of Oliver Queen and, Felicity thought, this was the reason why that day Oliver had invited her to dinner.

He hadn't held the bow for several days, but his life as Oliver Queen was very busy. They had just left the luxurious Hotel Plaza where Oliver had given several interviews for the elections, and the satisfaction of having captivated more than one journalist was evident on his face. As if that were not enough Walter had given also good news on the reacquisition of QC.

At that moment he must have felt for the first time to have the world at his fingertips. Unexpectedly, the first thing that Oliver wanted from that world, was take her to dinner.

"Like a date?" She asked incredulously.

It was a beautiful sunny day, but it was nothing compared to the expression of pure joy in his eyes while Oliver replied, "Yes, like a date."

Felicity looked at him with eyes full of admiration. Oliver had emerged from the swamp that had been his life after the island. He'd temporarily removed the cap of The Arrow and he wanted to move on with his life and he wanted do it with her.

"Yes, I'd love to "

The smile that they exchanged was light and innocent, clear as the sunny day. 

* * *

Who knows how much gossip magazines would have paid to get exclusive rights for the first date of the next aspiring mayor? They would have speculated on her evening dress? Or which restaurant was booked?

The truth is that on the evening of the date Felicity did not feel the need to impress Oliver with a stunning dress. It was very liberating to see, after having opened the door, that he too didn't feel compelled to show up in a tuxedo.

They weren't two strangers who had to know each other. They didn't need to impress each other. They knew they love each other. They just need to be together, with no threats looming, and finding the courage to take that step forward.

The dinner was perfect, in a small restaurant near the sea. Oliver had confessed that all the big changes in his life, unfortunately, had the sea in common. He wanted that night to become the next turning point, this time in a positive way. And they talked for the whole evening, at first so embarrassed, but then with more and more confidence. Oliver found the courage to caress her face as he said she was beautiful with her hair down. Felicity took his hand instead. Both were amazed at how much such a common gestures changed everything between them.

When the phone rang it was like waking from a dream. It was Diggle and could not be anything good.  
Oliver quickly paid the bill and they went straight to the new lair.

Once there, they not only found Digg but also Laurel waiting for them. They both had a such shocked face…

Laurel looked at her as if she hadn't expected to see her there. Felicity and Oliver had only told Diggle of their date and probably Laurel was now doing two and two together seeing Oliver leading her down the stairs by hand. Why Digg was sadly glanced at her?

Laurel had placed files on one of the tables, ready to be examined by Oliver. It was obvious that she didn't know where to start and Felicity was frightened by the fact that the new DA was so upset that she was acting like a novice student.

"First thing I have to talk about Thea .." she began in a firm voice. She held up a photo from the table and put it in his hand, holding her breath. "Sara send it to me..."

Oliver's face turned white and then became hard as stone. The picture was slightly out of focus but it showed without a shadow of doubt Thea with Malcolm Merlyn on a street in some China city.

"He cannot be!" She heard herself say, picking the photo from Oliver to see it better, "He is ... is ... dead."

She was looking for visible signs of photo editing, but it was impossible to find it with naked eye.

"It 's true Felicity" interrupted Laurel. "Sara has confirmed to me that they are following her. She's in Hong Kong," she continued watching Oliver "Sara didn't want to say anything until she was sure of it. She'll arrive tomorrow, and she'll tell you all that she has discovered "

Oliver nodded, "Okay ..." he said slowly. A storm of emotions on his face.

Without having the time to understand what implied the resurrection of Malcon Merlyn and his relationship with Thea, Laurel took the other file.

"Oliver this ..." Laurel began, but stopped to take a breath and then said, "This thing is very delicate"

She handed him a letterhead of the court of Central City. Felicity couldn't see what was written, but Oliver tried his hand with the nearest chair and slumped over it, putting a hand through his hair.

He lifted his head to look at her only a moment in the eyes. Felicity stood rooted by that look. A destroyed, guilty look as if he were looking her for the last time.

Felicity turned to Laurel, begging for an explanation.

"Sandra Hawke, has filed a lawsuit against the Queen family. She wants money and ... recognition. For her son Connor ... eight years ... and ... "Laurel swallowed painfully" He's Oliver's son"

Oliver? A son? Oliver? A son…

Laurel looked at her sadly with eyes full of pain. Only after a few seconds she realized what it implied. Eight years. Oliver was with her at the time and this is the most tangible result of his infidelity. Of how much of their history was corrupted and full of lies. But there was more. More pain, not for herself, but for her too. It wasn't a look of pity, but one of compassion. They had not been together one whole night and something was already taking Oliver away.

Felicity felt Diggle's arm around her waist as he held her to him. She had not realized that her legs were giving way, and that his friend had come to support her.

"It's sure? I mean... Are we sure that he's his son, "she asked incredulously

Laurel opened her mouth to respond, but instead was Oliver that began to talk.

"Sandra ... she told me she had lost the baby," he said as he flipped through the papers, "It says here that my mother has paid her to say so…"

Oh! The diabolical Moira Queen: dictating her's son life even from the death!

Oliver looked at her again with a dejected look. It was a hard blow. It was another mistake of his past that now was asking to be paid. And he certainly would have paid that, he was a new man, now, one who does not run away from responsibility.

Felicity knew that he would do the right thing. And not only for his own reputantion or for the next elections. Just a few hours ago she had spoken about the abandonment of her father, as how much that had marked her. Oliver had looked at her for the first time with eyes full of sorrow, for the orphan she was, but full of pride because she'd done it.

Oliver, willing or not, would not have escaped the responsibility of fatherhood as her father had done. She remembered the time when she told him about Thea and how he had assured her that she would never have losed him. That sense of terror returned a hundred times stronger.

Suddenly it was as if she could not breathe.

"I'll walk you home," Oliver said suddenly, rising heavily.

Digg watched her silently asking if it was okay. She nodded and, saying goodnight to Laurel, headed straight to the stairs. She heard Oliver talk to Digg and Laurel then followed her a few seconds later.

The ride home was quiet and full of anguish. Her mind was unable to go beyond the news of the evening and the fact that Oliver's priorities were terribly changed. Now not only The Arrow was the enemy of their relationship, but all the family Queen too. (legitimate or illegitimate)

His face said it all. It seemed to be back to three years before, when they had just met. When the mission was all that mattered to him.

Tomorrow they would begin the search for Thea and Oliver would have definitely gone to Central City to contact the mother of his child. And she would support him in all his decisions, as she had always done.

But tonight she could't help but pick up the pieces of a dream that was not even born.

On her doorstep Oliver took her hands.

"I'm sorry Felicity, I ..." the words seemed stones that he could not lift.

"I understand," she replied. Like in the Queen Masion. If anyone could read him like an open book was her. She did not want to be told that this would be their first and last date, at last for a very long time.

She took a breath and said, "Tomorrow we'll deal both situations" and managed to smile somehow "As we always do, as a team"

Oliver nodded, trying to smile, but failed miserably and looked at her with a lost look.

"I want to thank you for this evening," he said wistfully.

There was no need of other words. Felicity felt tears in her eyes.

Oliver caressed her face one more time and slowly approached her. When she realized that he wanted to kiss her, Felicity raised her hand, laying a finger gently on his lips to stop him.

"Maybe it's better not to know ..." she began. But the words died in her throat. How to tell him she'd rather not know what it feels like to kiss him, knowing that this will break her heart.

Oliver nodded. He gently took her hand, bringing it slowly to his mouth. Felicity accepted this kiss in silence, ignoring the chills that it caused.

"Good night," he said with a sigh.

"Good night," she replied. She watched him turn around and disappear into the night.

With that ended her first date with Oliver Queen.  
Even though this evening was a disaster, there will be others in the future. Better ones. Of this she was sure.


End file.
